babysainT

2007-09-11T02:01:00.000+08:00

its been a long time since i last blogged.. or to be exactly i allowed my posts to be viewed... life full of ups and down... car accident is like a frequent thing now... lol... got more chance to buy 4d... wads up in life? just like stock market... bring u higher and higher den just plunge u down like there's no tomorrow... y life so liddat? but i guess no 1 can really answer that question rite... wad to do... anyway a man can onli do wad a man can... wanna be god? try me...

im locking myself up again

2007-04-19T20:43:00.000+08:00

ok... so sch started... MA option caused the class to have onli abt 10 pple... zhihui in certain class so not really counted so onli other den having kaixiong in the same class practically i dunno eveyone except for wilson... surprising he in the same class as me but im like alien to him... dunno who am i... this sem seems boring... lecturer none of them seems fun... sian life... well at least liang wei lynn me and kx in the same gems class haha

2007-04-06T23:36:00.000+08:00

been working day and night or just been going out till late... don't really know what i'm doing anyway... i'm just tired... tired of people who deep down ain't being honest lest being sincere...
why do people come and go just like that? please don't take me as a friend that you need at times... please... i rather be off alone... yet i can't stand this loneliness.... someone tell me what to do... i think i'm gonna go hysterical over this... this really is'nt the way i want things to turn out... although always being quiet and trying to make myself smile... i wannt stop everything and just quit being me... i need you now more then ever.

2007-04-04T00:52:00.000+08:00

been a long long long time since i updated this... haha... kinda busy these few weeks... got work to do this and that... lost some money recently... omg la... been boring sch is gonna start soon and i cant wait for it to start... haha

2007-03-17T00:42:00.000+08:00

life is like so empty now... just realise that im working from like 9am to like 2 am everyday... trying to earn money and more money just to forget the things that are in my heart... why do i think of such a person that i hold so dear to me yet all i wan to is be friends... who am i kidding rite? i dunno... im just so tired... yet im going on...i have do go on... or at least thats what i wan to do... its like a monochrome world now

2007-03-08T23:41:00.000+08:00

froggy....prince....

2007-03-07T19:06:00.000+08:00

ok this is crappy.. i tot queensway will get me as relieve teacher... but nonononono... they had to choose somebody else... and stupid man... i shouldnt had turn down acer's job... so crappy... wth man.... and my heart hurts... i have to listen to parents and see a doctor... wtf is going on man... i rather just mati lor... this is damn crappy... im down to my last cent liao... jiejie have to spoil her fone and i have to pay... and wad else... this is bullshit i tell you bullshit!!! grrrrr i wan to throw banana at her car and piak man... this is shitty!!!!! and i rather that i just die... dun have to bother about bullshit anymore...

2007-02-23T23:16:00.000+08:00

ok... cny i escaped visiting... so practically i get no angbao cept thanx to matt mum and xj mun.... haha thanx.... boring week... have to do a vid for speech dae... boring... lol... liasing with ms b and the P omgomgomg..... and guess wad?? MOE approved me as a relief teacher!!!! o.O.... yay.... I WAN TO ME GTO TEACHER!!!! HAHA... muahahaha.... lol

2007-02-18T02:02:00.000+08:00

happi new yr!!! haha... to think ho chee men g will msg me... lol... sky gonna fall le... hope that this yr will be better for everyone... esp to liangwei for his yr 3... joyce and david for their career... my friends in their studies... and everyone else!!!

2007-02-14T22:54:00.000+08:00

yoyoyo... omg... this morning... 12am onwards was super wasted... cant walk properly man.. haha... thanx matt and kx for picking the 2 wasted dudes up.. me and adli!! haha... what do you do when you cant get down a rock formation? roll down!! haha... dude.. haha super wasted!!

2007-02-07T23:05:00.000+08:00

haha... today chinese new year concert rehersal... ok la... not bad la... tiring la... den bought bdae cake for daniel... rip off man... can buy 2 cakes at angie the chioce or bangawan solo... lol... nvm la... den very sorry to make the girls wait so long... paish the rehersal very long... den i also like wan to slp liao...exams finally over liao... yay can play!!! yay... oh ya... btw... good luck to san matt and xj for their o lvl results ya...

2007-02-07T20:27:00.000+08:00

Groove Coverage-The End

My home is in motion, as darkness unfolds.
The air overloaded, the sky's dancing gold.
But you went away, you left me to stay
We'll see us in heaven, I'm counting the days

At the end of time, at the end of us,
At the end of everything we had,
Only faith helps you, only grace can do
Only you can take the pain
Cause the end of peace is the end of life
and the end of any happiness
Only love helps you, only trust can do
Only you can take the pain of me

When thunder is calling I feel so alive
The very first morning, can you see the light?
But you closed the door, to what I adored
We'll see us in heaven, I'm counting no more

At the end of time, at the end of us,
At the end of everything we had,
Only faith helps you, only grace can do
Only you can take the pain
Cause the end of peace is the end of life
and the end of any happiness
Only love helps you, only trust can do
Only you can take the pain of me

2007-02-05T23:40:00.000+08:00

im going crazy man..i need something to do... everyday see 4 wall 1 floor 1 ceiling can mati ... not eat means go tido... wth man... this is boring cny comming and i wanna escape... sianz

2007-02-04T22:12:00.000+08:00

i want to laugh till i vomit blood... haha today went to mac and study... den end up liangwei watching soccer...cuz mac showing den too noisy cant study so nvm lor.. on the way home liangwei over shot the traffic light and went towards qss there... den aft that he ran towards the traffic light lor... den i was liek digging my bag for my mp3... den wth.. a police car stop by the side and call me.. i was like ??? did i do something wrong den wth la...
den he asked : you know that guy?
me : who?
police : the guy running?
me : why?
police : i see that ur looking for something in ur bag, did he take ur things?
me(still blur): ehh u mean that guy running to the traffic light?
police : ya...
me : ohh...that my friend, and i looking for my phone, my bag too much paper.
police : oic
me : (wth...) sorry the the trouble
police : nvm thanx.. goodnight.. (drive off in a WRX!!!)

called liangwei to tell him that... wanted to say i dunno him den police chase him haha... jk la... lol....

what your bdae means

2007-02-02T21:28:00.000+08:00

Your Birthdate: August 7

You are an island. You don't need anyone else to make you happy.
And though you see yourself as a loner, people are drawn to you.
Deep and sensitive, you tend to impress others with your insights.
You also tend to be psychic - so listen to that inner voice!

Your strength: Your self sufficiency

Your weakness: You despise authority

Your power color: Maroon

Your power symbol: Hammer

Your power month: July

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

2007-01-29T22:03:00.000+08:00

i want to hold u close to me.
i want to hold ur hands and never let go.
i want to gaze into ur eyes that resembles the night sky.
i want to love you like there's nothing in the world that's worth you.
i want to wake up each and every morning to see your smile that brightens up my day.

you make me want to not sleep wishing that the day would never come to an end.
you make me feel something that i have never ever felt before.
you make me feel like i'm the luckiest person alive.
you make me waking up to see your smile.
you make me happy.

i don't want to sleep fearing that when i wake up, i wont get to see you.
there's nothing that will trouble me as long as i'm with you.
nothing beats being with you.
nothing can be more important than you.

dude... thats so romantic?!?! haha and its from me... to erm... lol?

2007-01-28T01:38:00.000+08:00

it hurts.. i wan to be normal... im not stressed but there too many things to think about... really... what if i just die one day... wouldn't it be better? i mean its like just to aviod all those medicine... dude... i really hate this life....

2007-01-28T00:57:00.000+08:00

what is going on today man... how come everyone sounds so like pissed off with me liddat... wth... i dunno wads going on dudes.... omg omg omg... if i said or did smth wrong at least tell me please... im like so blur la... omg omg omg.... wad i do... wad i say... wth... i think if everyone like not happy den i go MIA for awhile lor... wad to do...

2007-01-25T22:43:00.000+08:00

cool eh?? haha?? power of platinium!!

2007-01-23T23:06:00.000+08:00

in 3 weeks..

will you?

2007-01-22T23:36:00.000+08:00

my life is turned up side down man... everything seems to go wrong... imagine u got a muscle tear that cant be healed properly because of another reason... my knee hurts like krazy man... god... haha got lost in crystal's place... wth... its a maze.... and i limped all around looking for a letter box.... and got the tai tais' pressie to them which burnt a hole in my wallet... damn.. haha...

2007-01-18T18:56:00.000+08:00

i dunno wads their freakin problem... one moment say this and that, another moment blame me for not telling them. how i wish i was not borned... wth... everytime liddat... wan to break liao... lemme be alone for all you care. all you care is your freaking wallet and your stinking company.

2007-01-13T01:38:00.000+08:00

how has he come to happen here? having no hesistation, holding no thought of harassment or hindrance. he is only here to have what which holds him hostage.how ever on this hour of howls and horrors, he hastily hikes from hell to heaven and seeks henceforth to hopefully halt his hunger happenstance. he has just humiliated himself, not her.

2007-01-06T12:41:00.000+08:00

is seems that all these laughter and smiles are not genuine, not whether being an outcast or not, rather, just have this feeling that that no matter what is going on, there's no one to be there. frankly, rather then just being accomodating, preferences to be introvert is still possible the best option, needless to bother about anything and living in the fantasy world of self-indulgence, there doesnt seem to be anything to worry nor care for. is it bad? reserve the pride and dignity, there's no need for such treatment. nothing to hold on anymore, its just all letting go.

thanx

2006-12-29T00:35:00.000+08:00

woo~~
outgoing calls 3000mins
incoming calls 5000 mins
call to U.S 120 mins
bill : $250

wth wad is the world comming to man... yay i love STARHUB man... haha talk so much yet pay so lil... 133.333 hrs on the fone.that like 5.5 days???

woo~~

song:if tomorrow never comes

2006-12-25T22:28:00.000+08:00

Sometimes late at night
I lie awake and watch her sleeping
She's lost in peaceful dreams
So I turn out the light and lay there in the dark
And the thought crosses my mind
If I never wake in the morning
Would she ever doubt the way I feel
About her in my heart

If tomorrow never comes
Will she know how much I loved her
Did I try in every way to show her every day
That she's my only one
And if my time on earth were through
And she must face this world without me
Is the love I gave her in the past
Gonna be enough to last
If tomorrow never comes

'Cause I've lost loved once in my life
Who never knew how much I loved them
Now I live with the regret
That my true feelings for them never were revealed
So I made a promise to myself
To say each day how much she means to me
And avoid that circumstance
Where there's no second chance to tell her how I feel

If tomorrow never comes
Will she know how much I loved her
Did I try in every way to show her every day
That she's my only one
And if my time on earth were through
And she must face this world without me
Is the love I gave her in the past
Gonna be enough to last
If tomorrow never comes

So tell that someone that you love
Just what you're thinking of
If tomorrow never comes

2006-12-21T23:39:00.000+08:00

yea.. deviod of the things i love... i learn how to kill in order to feel save... i doubt they even bother abt wad i am... who cares... u care?

ps.. im allegic to bs

2006-12-21T01:06:00.000+08:00

time flies... i really missed those days... how in the hell could i be so stupid and mades all those wrong turns in my life.. i wish that everything can just stop for 1 hour and let me take a breather... y am i the person i am today... y am i not the person i am ytd?will i be the same person i am today tomorrow?on the surface.. i missed u so... ytd come to think of it i doesnt really matter to me anymore... the facade?parady?u keep appearing on my mind constantly.. yet i cant seem to feel anything except for this emptiness... hungry? maybe. yet, wad do i hunger for? it's definately not food. and when i can least expect. i got this urge.. dun u think that love is a kind or drug? u get high on ur hormones. and feel the pain aft enjoyment? is that true? i dunno, u tell me. nothing is forever, yet why does feel like eternal in this persiod of time. wad is it that flows through my neurons to my brain? why can i feel the things that are meaning less yet why cant i feel the feeling that i want to? why can i remember all this things so vividly, why am i blessed with such memories? am i blessed? or is a cursed? who knows. or rather, who cares? to me now the world means nothing. maybe someday someone will somehow warm my heart once more..
i guess all this can be describe into be lonely..
well.. as if u cared... i wished for u to be happy. merry christmas.
bye.

2006-12-08T01:20:00.000+08:00

wad is the world turning into now lor... knn things here and there gettin pushed abt... wad is going on lor... so many story all dunno true anot... got pple not hpy shoot here shoot there... damn cb lor.. knn... wth do you guys wan lor... knn... instead of pushing blame to others den just blame me lor... im the one that wanted the seperate arrangement wad... so if u not happy den just blame me ok? stop blaming OTHERS THAT ARE INNOCENT. ok fine! its my fault lor... nt happy den i also dun show face lor... save the embaressment for everyone la... hey, just take it that from now on im invisible.. and stop pointing fingers lor. and throw all ur knifes to me and i'll just walk away... dunno understand go listen to franz ferdinand-walk away.. u will understand... nth more to say liao... wan talk den see how lor... cant be BOTHERED!! if u still regard us as friends den thanx.. if not den i really cant blame you.. its just you!!

=)

2006-12-04T02:02:00.000+08:00

faster holiday i wan die liao .... kena letter liao sian

2006-11-27T00:31:00.000+08:00

im sick.. omg.. im fking sick... how could i get this kind of fking sickness... damn...

as if anyone cared.

2006-11-17T01:26:00.000+08:00

absolut cuteness, haven found a sweetness yet though...

2006-11-11T01:48:00.000+08:00

[Verse 1:]
Story of my life
Searching for the right
But it keeps avoiding me
Sorrow in my soul
Cause it seems that wrong
Really loves my company

He's more than a man
And this is more than love
The reason that the sky is blue
But clouds are rolling in
Because I'm gone again
And to him I just can't be true

[Hook:]
And I know that he knows I'm unfaithful
And it kills him inside
To know that I am happy with some other guy
I can see him dying

[Chorus:]
I don't wanna do this anymore
I don't wanna be the reason why
Everytime I walk out the door
I see him die a little more inside
I don't wanna hurt him anymore
I don't wanna take away his life
I don't wanna be.... a murderer

[Verse 2:]
I feel it in the air
As I'm doing my hair
Preparing for another date
A kiss up on my cheek
He's here reluctantly
As if I'm gonna be out late
I say I won't be long
Just hanging with the girls
A lie I didn't have to tell
Because we both know
Where I'm about to go
And we know it very well

[Hook:]
Cause I know that he knows I'm unfaithful
And it kills him inside
To know that I am happy with some other guy
I can see him dying

[Chorus:]
I don't wanna do this anymore
I don't wanna be the reason why
Everytime I walk out the door
I see him die a little more inside
I don't wanna hurt him anymore
I don't wanna take away his life
I don't wanna be.... a murderer

[Breakdown:]
Our Love... his trust
I might as well take a gun and put it to his head
Get it over with
I don't wanna do this
Anymore (anymore)

Oooohhh... anymore

[Chorus:]
I don't wanna do this anymore
I don't wanna be the reason why
And everytime I walk out the door
I see him die a little more inside
I don't wanna hurt him anymore
I don't wanna take away his life
I don't wanna be.... a murderer

ooo... a murderer...
No, no, no... yeah

2006-11-01T00:11:00.000+08:00

feeling so forgotten in this world that moves so fast i don't even know where i belong.walking around understanding the meaning of the term loneliness.what can i do to make u notice my existance.what does it truly mean to love someone.i'm feeling so fake trying to smile yet deep down is like an empty well.i doubt my words.my actions.myself.what is this im feeling.such a warm anf fuzzy feeling when i see you.my heart races like its going to explode.but i know that you're not mine to have.for this.there's only one thing to describe you.ambrosia.

2006-10-22T00:09:00.000+08:00

wad do i nid.what do i want.why i do the things i do.im really tired.lemme do the things i enjoy.lets me have a space for myself.down to the point.does it concern me at all.what do these problems gotta do with me.im only human.i wan to be me.please let me go.why do i even smile and try to make u peeps happy.just let me be my quiet self.whether or not u like it im letting go.let me love those i love.i dun wan ur problems.i have mine.but i dun see u trying to understand mine.why is it that u think u r in such a bad situation when u haven even walked the shoes of others.why cant u just stop and let me deal with my problems.why is it that im invisble.i dun wanna know anymore.let me go.i beg of you once more.severe these chains thats holding me down.today i choose a new pathway to follow.for better for worse.i decide.

2006-10-14T00:28:00.000+08:00

yea...gonna start working again... gotta make some moolah... its kinda boring recently, dont really have much things to do... pon gems till cannot pon liao... pon 1 more time den letter liao... sian... gonna leave that last skipping of sch to the last week... so can get extra hols...muahaha...
why are pple so troubled with things that dont even concern them... its tiring... why do pple help other pple around when the latter don't even bothers abt you?y cant we just go abt worrying abt out own shit and not others? something that i nid to know... tell me if u have an answer... its just plain old tiring for the poor soul.

2006-10-07T12:42:00.000+08:00

haha nice pic? this is wad i call math? lol at least i know my factoring... lol... sian... haha

2006-10-04T23:32:00.000+08:00

honestly... if u got a prob with me plz tell me... knn... wth is wrong wif u pple... i am ME.. not YOU... boring lessons that fall asleep too... wads the point with this crappy time table.. thursday study from 8 to 6pm?!?! wth... sure sleep...sian sian sian sian sian.... im such a nobody man... everyone is like got their own life now... damn spare tyre la... yea i admit i have little friends that i socialise with that thats my prob... i dun really like to talk to pple that much but im appreciative of the pple ard me.. and also im grateful to them for making my life interesting and brighten my day... dunno wad i will do without you people... and another thing is that i know that i like u thats a fact... but cant u understand that you and me are from different world? sometimes i dunno how to tell u but its like im so packed that i dun wanna hurt u and all... wad can i do? im juz useless as a bum... i hope u will forgive me for the path i choose... a path that only i will understand... i dun nid to explain to you the reasons for this journey... in due time... everything will be as clear as water... no point explaining in black and white.. this is something that i must do... for myself...

2006-10-01T22:25:00.000+08:00

old dudes... dun make noise of the clothes i wear and the type of shirts i wear... 90% of my shirts are white cuz i love white... doesnt mean i cant wear black too... dun make noise of the black shirts that i buy... im wearing it and not you... for goodness sake... be practical...

2006-10-01T01:31:00.000+08:00

"Blackened ivory, burnt to the core.The colour of night burns through into my soul.No rest in my mind, pain grips me tightly to the end.No one but the raven will embrace me now as I lay in darkness, dying.Leaving this world will not prove me wrong.All I can do is let go."

1. I love you not because of who you are, but because of who I am when I am with you.
2. No man or woman is worth your tears, and the one who is, won't make you cry.
3. Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.
4. A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart.
5. The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them knowing you can't have them.
6. Never frown, even when you are sad, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.
7. To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.
8. Don't waste your time on a man/woman, who isn't willing to waste their time on you.
9. Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one, so that when we finally meet the person, we will know how to be grateful.
10. Don't cry because it is over, smile because it happened.
11. There's always going to be people that hurt you so what you have to do is keep on trusting and just be more careful about who you trust next time around.
12. Make yourself a better person and know who you are before you try and know someone else and expect them to know you.
13. Don't try so hard, the best things come when you least expect them to.
REMEMBER: WHATEVER HAPPENS, HAPPENS FOR A REASON.

2006-09-29T00:35:00.000+08:00

i piak u, u piak me, we r hpy piakology, and a piak for me and another from me to you, wun u say u piak me too... damn im so tired... bleah... muahahahahah sian... damn sian... sian till lao sai... sian until cannot sian anymore... first week of sch dunno pon how many lesson liao... den also rmb monday called my PTN asshole...hahaha im evil....twitting makes ur hand tired more often and waste sms space?!?! lol sorries lors... haha ii am eviil de lors.. haha sian... why euu so liddat de neix? gibb xinhui aka grandson see tat ii twit liddat de sure kill me de lors... haha dunno de lors... haha everything ting tat ends wiif lors ish a good word lors... haha even scold pple can polite de lors... sian lors... ii lurbbe euu? hahaha sian lors...buais

2006-09-20T13:31:00.000+08:00

credit, liability. c'mon, be realistic without the $$ dun even bother to talk and worst of all dun live on credit. it cant let u go on foreva... cant u juz repect the decisions of others and for goodness sake admit that there's something wrong with yourself. stop behaving like ur a king. being pampered in the past 17 years of your life was your downfall.. how long can u survive like this. what do u intend to do in the next 10 rs of your life.. belittling your very own life? cheap-o... how long do u expect us to go on like this? honestly we juz nid a break from all these we have out own things to solve. dun think that ur problems are so great, we have greater problems.. why make such a biggie out of who loves me and who loves me not when there are pple who have problems over juz a simple 3 meals a day and dun even complain a shit for all these... look at the mirror and see urself i wonder what appears. everyone's perception on things are always defferent. making a blunder of yourself and claiming that ur shit right is juz wrong..

p.s bullshit cant get u anywhere

2006-09-15T01:20:00.000+08:00

the fact is that lying to everyone else, im just lying to myself too... i just hate all these crap... please repesct my decision for once. no. im not gonna break down or shit. but this iss bullshit

2006-09-14T12:22:00.000+08:00

001.Real name:Siew Hong Yao
002.Nickname: pao or pau, babysaint, dynx, fei zai or ah pui
003.Single or taken: single
004.Zodiac sign: Snake
005.Male or female: male
006.Elementary Sch: New Town Primary School
007.Ipod: which 1? got total of 4 haha
008.How many buddies on ur list: msn? 180 hp? 255
009.Friendster name: potato
010.Hair color: dark brown/mocha latte with dark chocolate kinda brown
012.Hair long or short: short
014.Eye color: egg white with brown egg yolk
015.Are u health freak: not really i smk and drink for goodness sake
016.Height: 1.76m
017.Do u haf a crush on some1: well.. no.. who would want me anyway
018.Do u like urself: what u think
019.Braces: no way..anyway mines kinda st8 except for the first 2 teeth, cant put it thou still got baby teeth... any summore how to kiss?
020.Think u're awesome: who cares? as long as im me
021.Piercings: yea but wun tell u how many
022.Tattoo: someday maybe

Your 'Firsts'
024.Surgery: hmM? no idea?
025.Piercings: primary 4 that means 10 yrs old
026.Best friend: if it's gonna be 1 den maybe liangwei lor... but u kno that there're more out there the person that made me do this is one of them
027.Award: cant rmb
028.Sport u joined: badminton
029.Pet: doggie
030.Vacation: first would be malaysia i think, went there so young juz to see granny
031.Concert: nope..unless rammstein or the prodigy would come to singapore
032.Love: pillow

Favorites
033.Movie: little nicky
034.TV show: that 70s show
035.Color: deep purple
039.Drink: orange juice...other den the other intoxicating drinks
040.Body part excludin face: does my long finger nails count?
041.Cartoon: justice league
042.Piece of clothing: none
043.Brand of clothing: adidas for shirts, nike for shoe, lee or levis for pants... if not den anything that would feel comfy would do
044.Thing u slp with: a bed, 3pillows, 1 bolster and blanket
045.School: not really.. juz the pple i get to meet thr maybe?
046.Animal: dog
047.Book: ehh... too many?
048.Magazine: stuffs
049.Food: meat

Now
050.Im drinking: green tea
052.Im abt to: go get lunch
053.Listenin to: don't cry by guns and roses
055.Waiting for: ehh? you? sushi? no idea
056.Watching: this blog thnx to georgie haha .. also watch my hamster sleeping beside my wallet
057.Wearing: butt naked? haha juz a normal polo tee 3/4 pants

Your Future
058.Want Kids: yea
059.Want to get married: well... if there's a chance
060.Careers in mind: teacher?

Which is better with e opposite gender

068.Lips or eyes: eyes

069.Hugs or kisses: hugs

070.Shorter or taller: does it really matter?

072.Romantic or spontaneous: both?

073.Nice stomach or arms: both too?

074.Sensitive or loud: in between?

075.Hookup or relationship: relationship

076.Sweet or caring: i dun wan to choose? both!

077.Troublemaker or hesitant: none of the stated

Have u ever

078.Kissed a stranger: nope

079.Drank bubbles: coke?pepsi?

080.Lost glasses or contacts: glasses misplace contacts drop cuz eye too dry haha

081.Ran away from home: if u count getting lost as one den yea else no

082.Broken a bone: nope

083.Got an X-ray: yea

084.Broken someone's heart: yea..sorry

086.Turned someone down: yea...

087.Cried when someone died: yar..duh..

88.Cried at school: nope

Do u believe in

089.God: yea...cuz im one.. haha jk

090.Miracles: if there ever is

091.Love at first sight: nope

093.Aliens: yea

094.Magic: maybe?

095.Heaven: possible?

096.Santa Claus: ehh no

097.Sex on e first date: nahh....

098.Kissing on e first date: depends

099.Angels: if one day i see them den i will consider..

Answer Truthfully100.Is there someone u want to be with right now: yea...

Name 20 people u can think of right now.Dont read e question(s) until you've named e 20 people. At e end of this,choose 5 people to do this.

crystal
george
zoe
andre
liangwei
sandra
kaixiong
febby
pearlyn
ling yi
daniel
ivan tan
ivan law
wee keat
michael
andrea
wei yi
royston
matthew
kimberly

how did i meet#14(wee keat): he's my class mate

what would u do if u nv meet#1(crystal): eh tough question..

What is #9(pearlyn) & #20(kimberly) dates:nahh... they're crazy enuf to kiss each other wads so surprising?

would #6(sandra) & #17(wei yi) makes a good couple: nahh lesbos..

Describe#3: nice, crazy, sweet tooth, abusive..

Is #8(febby) attractive:definately =)

Describe #7(kaixiong): drunk..haha..

is #12(ivan tan) family member: no idea

What would u do if #18(royston) confesses to u dat he likes u: squeeze his cheeks den tell him im not gay =)

What language does #15(michael) speak: english and funny chinese

Who is #9(pearlyn) going out with: kaixiong lor

How old is #16(andrea): 14

When is e last time u spoke to #13(ivan law): last month

Who is #2(george)'s fav band/singer:S.H.E

Would u ever date #4(andre): no..he is a guy..beast fwen and also my wife haha

Would u ever date #1(crystal): would u date ur daughter?

Is 19(matthew) single: no

What's #10's(ling yi) last name: Quek

Would u ever be in a relationship with #11(daniel): no nit even if im gay

School of #3(zoe): sp

Where does #6(sandra) live: boon lay

What's ur fav thing abt #5(liangwei): understand me lots..

Have u seen #2(george) naked: hell yes.. haha jkjk no... thats so gay

nw passin on to e unlucky 5

1: crystal

2: andre

3: ling yi

4: andrea

5: zoe

2006-09-13T22:01:00.000+08:00

life change, people change, for better for worse. rmb in the past where i would find reasons to watch yet know i dun even bother abt tv. there're things where u wish it would'nt change, after all we're all humans, filled with emotions, desire and selfishness. sometimes pple wish that time would just go back and undo the mistakes, but is it so important, the mistakes will still be carried out in the later part of life, life is a mistake to be learnt. sometimes i wonder y things would never turn out the way it should? but then again, there are things u nvr know.

p.s in the eyes of a perfectionist, nothing is perfect.

2006-09-11T01:35:00.000+08:00

i really dun understand some of u pple out thr... frankly i know that im trying to be nice to u all, but please for hell's sake dun exploit me, im wasting my time trying to do smth that u peps dun even appreciate and what's more u dun gimmi a single cents, every minute im sitting there sensing the laziness thats in the air irks me, do you think that i am one without emotions, even superman nids a break from all this bullshitting from peps that try to bullshit by shitting and thinking like bulls. what do u wanna try by asking me to aid in all these unreasonable, i'm willing to try dun expect me to do things beyond my will, especially not beyond my line of duties. stop acting like ur all in a sorry state, i wanna emphatise with you, but now, i feel that its pathetic, get a life, grow up, stop acting like the world revolves around you. u wanna know how i really feel, i feel that im just tissue paper to you peps, use and throw.

I HAVE MY PROBLEMS TOO, AND ALSO
IM ALLEGIC TO BULLSHIT

2006-09-11T01:19:00.000+08:00

the condradicting question of certain things within your grasp is annoying. actions have to be planned. its like a puzzle, one by one u get the pieces and when the day comes, the jigsaw is complete but then u wanna frame it up, someone just have to knock into u and again the jigsaw have to be pieced together again. a contraversy? a continuation? or a contrain on the stamina of the mind? commendatory.

2006-09-10T00:37:00.000+08:00

i have my reasons for doing the things i do... i do them without having to answer to anyone... its my choice my decision therefore i have the final say in my life... no one shall presume i have to do things against my will... beyond my abilities... expected the unexpected... and please do not expliot the help i offer...

2006-09-06T22:08:00.000+08:00

deception.assumption.prosecution.conviction.salvation.retribution.reincarnation.repetition.

read it 2 by 2 and go figure

2006-09-05T23:23:00.000+08:00

deception or deciet, repetition or salvation? wads rite or wrong, wads the truth? everynow and then, we seek to know the truth, but is it really true, or just an illusion to appear that wad we know as the truth really just isnt? wads the difference between a lie and the truth, possibly more den juz knowing facts? how do u make some1 trust u? retain ur trust? or possibly redeem it? wad made you lost ur trust in other's eyes? is this juz a dream, or am i still in wonderland? can i see the other side? maybe one kind soul would be able to slap me back to reality. i'm clueless, how bout' you? are you gonna go with the other's or go a seperate path to seek the one answer, take me along, not one second can i stay in the fantasy world of misleading paths, one that is ever so confusing, where am i to stand, who am i to you, what does my presence gotta do with all these, i wonder. loneliness maybe the one way to open these eyes wide enough to look at the surrounding, but is that the only way out? the coldness, the seperation, the agony, this is just a world that is another form of deception. god bless. and hopefully godspeed

2006-09-05T02:45:00.000+08:00

wondering y i even blog... no 1 gives a damn anyway, this is a short post, nice dinner with the 404 peps and annie tan, thanx, nvr had a class quite like this, bb

2006-09-03T23:41:00.000+08:00

love is like a cigarette, it will only burn while it last, the match that lights the cigarette will be hurt in one way or another. don't use the word lightly, its a debt to others and yourself. love itself also means its time to let go, although it hurts but its true. women's form of expression is in their faces, u can see it, but for men's its in their hearts, only meant to be felt by others. in this world, the issue is not whether who's right or who's wrong, rather, its who treasure who.

got it in an sms, translated by yours truly.

their things in life that u may not think i kno, but please im only human i do have feelings too, i dun intend to know everything but i do, its a mistake that i made, one that can nvr be undone, once bitten twice shy, this time, i hope i kno wad u wan me to react.

Dream theater-The Answer Lies Within
Look around
Where do you belong
Don't be afraid
You're not the only one

Don't let the day go by
Don't let it end
Don't let a day go by in doubt
The answer lies within

Life is short
So learn from your mistakes
And stand behind
The choices that you make
Face each day
With both eyes open wide
And try to give
Don't keep it all inside

Don't let the day go by
Don't let it end
Don't let a day go by in doubt
The answer lies within

You've got the future on your side
You're gonna be fine now
I know whatever you decide
You're gonna shine

Don't let the day go by
Don't let it end
Don't let a day go by in doubt
You're ready to begin
Don't let a day go by in doubt
The answer lies within

2006-09-03T01:31:00.000+08:00

Depeche Mode-Damaged People

We're damaged people Drawn together
By subtleties that we are not aware of
Disturbed souls
Playing out forever
These games that we once thought we would be scared of

When you're in my arms
The world makes sense
There is no pretense
And you're crying
When you're by my side
There is no defense
I forget to sense
I'm dying

We're damaged people
Praying for something
That doesn't come from somewhere deep inside us
Depraved souls
Trusting in the one thing
The one thing that this life has not denied us

When I feel the warmth
Of your very soul
I forget I'm cold
And crying
When your lips touch mine
And I lose control
I forget I'm old
And dying
-----

nice song... slow.. rock... things in my head that shldnt be thr.. no idea y.. wanna take all the worry away... juz wanna be happy everyday...

2006-09-02T12:46:00.000+08:00

friday was okok lor slack at hm den aft that go play pool awhile with kx and daniel den ltr lw got come... den aft that wanted to see show de.. budden muvee too late den they dun wan watch le so we go make fun of pearlyn... haha aft that me and kx go hm took 195 until near esplanade thr cuz wrong direction lol... den reach hm at 1am lol

2006-09-01T00:21:00.000+08:00

teacher's day was not bad... morning went to anchoepoint to buy CAKE...BLACK FOREST CAKE... aft that took 250 to hawker makan nasi lemak cuz scared the cake PIAK....den go sch was like so early.. nid slp... den all was good...except for the fact that i tore my shirt backstage... stupid mic stand.. haha den we had cake in control rm.. see all those boiboi eat cake damn funny like spreading cake all over their face.. haha... the seniors dint eat.. all too shy... celebrated with cheng and wong mc... forgot to left cake for naina and TA chong.. wth la... so malu.. lol.. concert was nice... see dance dance dance and more dance... piano was nice too... juz the fact that i broke my fingernail when testing mic for piano... wth... remind me when i wan piano dun have long nails or cut it!! haha... den aft that went hm slp slp awhile... den meet liangwei go play lan awhile... den everyone was shouting cept me.. see... im so civilised... den aft that went to great world makan cuz that pearlyn work there at yoshinoya.. think this is how it's spelt den nvr treat me makan de... den nvm.. me and liangwei made ling yi and andrea wait like 2 hrs? omg lor... haha... sorry... den went home... me and liangwei was like walking the whole of great world juz for a stupid ATM machine..haha...

F.Y.I.. msm lim speech is still forever so boring... shh.. dun let her see this haha... anw i grad liao...

wanna wish all teacher happy teacher's day

hey baby... y do u slp so early today? nidda hear ur voice u kno.. haha...

Q: will you still love me in the morning?
A: forever, and ever, baby

2006-08-26T00:42:00.000+08:00

In the monopoly for the anomaly, in order for all to be in harmony, do not procrastinate my authority for this impossibility, face it, its reality.

2006-08-22T23:10:00.000+08:00

I wept coz I had no shoes, unit I saw a man who had no feet. think again if you feels tat the whole word is against you and feels like giving up there's always someone out there whose is worse then you. this was smth a close person to me wrote. true isnt it? b4 u think of youself, open ur eyes and look ard. haha as long dun piak can liao. haha sian

2006-08-21T02:54:00.000+08:00

the next song on the piano is for you.and it will my last.maybe someday,someone will understand.

2006-08-20T12:17:00.000+08:00

today i pick my stand.the path i've chosen. alone i shall walk.into the darkness that falls behind my every footstep.no time no think nor stop.rest is just another word in the dictionary.what keeps me going on is the fear.not the fear of dying nor losing.but the fear of falling down and....PIAK

hahaha sian... write poem den end with piak... damn duhh lor... haha... but its true. this is the path that im walking alone. shrouded in darkness. except for the piak part la... so lame lor... wan act cool and act cute haha...plssSS...haha

sian wed 1 mroe paper den fri 1 more paper den go drinking den eat sushi... i dun mind doing this everyday... LOOKING FOR SPONSORS. haha

2006-08-18T01:30:00.000+08:00

some shit essay me and kx wrote and that shit faced teacher of mine said it was shit.i wanted to shit on my pants but i had no shit, and my pants was shitless at the end of the day. what a shitty day for the shitty pple in the shitty place.every wondered how we even got into this shit and most importantly is how to get the shit out?!?! asshole.

The recent case of Huang Na murder reveal a disturbing side of human nature that human nature- tends to take advantage of those who are weak, vulnerable or powerless. Do you agree with this statement?

Yes, I do agree.

When the case was first made known to the public, everyone assumed that it was just another murder case, but what made it big was the insights of a criminal’s mind.

People tend to take advantage of others who dare not speak up.
For example, in work place, most people would push their work to those who dare not speak up while are afraid of those who are fierce. Most workers tend to slack when their bosses or supervisors are nice people while they will work harder when their bosses or supervisors are fierce. Discipline masters in schools must also be fierce in front of the students while they might not be in real life.

Humans are afraid of bullies, yet take advantages of people who are weaker than them.
When you see someone bullying another person, would you stand up against him? No. why? Because you are afraid of getting into trouble yourself.

But if some one smaller than you pick a fight and you definitely win the fight due to the fact that he doesn’t have a gang and stuff would you fight him? Yes would be the answer in most cases.

Take the recent Huang Na case for example. Why would that guy pick on a 10 year old girl whose body is not even matured instead of a fully grown lady? Probably because the girl was a much easier target compared to the lady. This shows us how humans take advantages of people weaker than them.

From an outsider's view, most people would just think that Huang Na’s murder case was caused due to the fact that the murderer is mentally challenged. However, upon deeper consideration, that guy might have done just what others wanted to do yet was afraid of the law. Do you think that Singapore will be a peaceful place without police? No, people will go robbing banks for money if police and laws did not exist. And why did they do that? Probably because they desire more money? Humans have no limits to their greed, lust and stuff. There is never an ending to greed because you would forever have a desire for more. Greed and desire is the root of the problems in most humans as people would tend to their emotion to thinking for them.

To the extend in which humanity would do for money is amazingly unbelievable. They could chop off the hands and legs of a fellow human being and leave them on the streets to beg for money and at the end of the day, they would take away the money that guy begged just to satisfy their need for money, yet they never thought of how that person feels having their limbs chop off while the people around him just throw money onto his bowl in order to feel less guilty. But have you thought about what happens if nobody donated any money to that poor soul? If he had received no donations at the end of the day, he would have probably spent the night starving. People in Africa are starving to death yet here in Singapore, we see people wasting food all the time, while asked to donate for the needy, people would shrink away from the sight of donating. Humans would rather live their life avoiding guiltiness than stand up to face it.

Life is precious yet most humans would go through all means to satisfy their desires.

Probably because humans go for looks. Yet it isn't the choice of a soul to choose when, where and what they are born with.

Everyone is unique. Unlike other species on earth which are more than happy just to eat and sleep everyday, humans seek misery, and to some extent, there are those that find pleasure in other’s pain. Maybe it’s the emotions humans were born with which is far too much for humans to handle.

It is indeed true that humans are one of the most highly intelligent species throughout the world yet what the murderer had done in this case was deemed humane? These are just some examples how we humans think and work.

When we see someone commit a crime, we naturally think that it is to achieve things that they might not have. Though this might be true to a certain extent, onlookers like us have barely scratched the surface of understanding their mentality.

In the mind of a murderer, does it mean that killing someone is due to extreme hatred to that person? I doubt so. There are many reasons behind it that we might never think of, such as insecurity, fetishes or maybe to them it’s an urge.

Where does this urge come from, and why is so powerful? If we all experienced this urge, would we be able to resist?

Would it be genetic, hormonal, biological, or cultural conditioning? Do serial killers have any control over their desires? We all experience rage and inappropriate sexual instincts, yet we have some sort of internal cage that keeps our inner monsters locked up. Call it morality or social programming, these internal blockades have long since been trampled down in the psychopathic killer. Not only have they let loose the monster within, they are virtual slaves to its beastly appetites.

The killer most probably had hidden emotions that he was not able to bring out due to the society, to the point that these emotions urges to get out and take over him. Now, his emotions are controlling him. No longer being able to think straight, words and actions meted out are feelings and desires that were once being locked away.

Maybe once being a prey to other’s abuse, inner rage or anger can no longer be kept aside. Something must be done, but not in the appropriate manner. It is possible that once before, in the eyes of others, weak, vulnerable or powerless. Once not able to control oneself anymore, humans at that point will pass on such actions to the weak, vulnerable or powerless. And just by doing so, a sense of power; superiority sets in, making one feel better about them self, and in this case, going overboard. Humans naturally act on impulse, using emotion do the thinking for them, never bothering about the consequences until faced with it.

Life is a rat race. Getting ahead by whatever means is a priority in today’s world. We try means and way to be better than the weak, vulnerable or powerless, while not wanting to challenge those on top of us fearing that we might lose out.

Lastly, in the world today, lets be realistic, its is a dog eat dog situation out there. Not wanting to improve oneself or attaining superiority will only result in being an outcast. The world is ever so changing, for the better, for the worse. It all depends on the mentality of each and every individual, but nevertheless; we all have something in common, and people all desire to be on top of everyone else. Even though it is taking advantage of the weak, vulnerable or powerless, as long as we see a chance to use it against them for our own benefits, people will do it, and even for some people, to the extent of not caring if it is morally right just for the sake of achieving their goals. Although it is a disturbing side of human nature, we live with it our entire life, even showing these behaviors without knowing it.

Let’s put it in a few simple words, it is who we are and what we are capable of doing.

2006-08-17T12:11:00.000+08:00

there's something seriously wrong... haha im sick... these 2 weeks exam week... and i nvr study... wth... cant even look at the page for 1 min b4 closing the book and day dream liao... omg man...i wan to go sentosa again splash splash again... den get all wet and drink gin this time haha.. splash splash haha.... i sound like a kid... wth... there's too many things in my head heard of the song journey? sometimes it feel like no one understands, i dont even know why i do the things i do.. well i guess right now thats how i'm feeling? but in the end of the day who cares? right now, my world is just black and white. i just wan to tell her that im sorry. i shall not further explain. my head hurts, i really appreciate what i have but sometimes it feel that none of them are of use to me.

ps. i just wan to say sorry, if you know who u are.

apologies

2006-08-12T00:41:00.000+08:00

sorry to kx for being so moody for th epast 2 weeks... dint had much of slp...really sorry... haha... ok i really think that im gonna die for exams lor... at least gimmi a marginal pass den next sem den chiong like crazy liao... its time to stop playing ard and study... sound abit no life right? but i really dunno how to go thru this lor.. too many things on my mind.. sometimes i really miss daddy david's teaching... help me with all sorts of trouble... and i rmb the 2 words that really hit the spot..GROW UP! haha but true enough...i wonder if the world is every so lonely? is it just me? or does everyone feel the same way too? but come to think of it, i really gotta thank kx too, tolerating me these few weeks and smile. and thanks for sentosa too... really made my day

2006-08-09T23:53:00.000+08:00

pice of love lighter on the left. automatik fossil on the right.

2006-08-09T23:34:00.000+08:00

i reall gotta thank you guys for making the 2 days so special... and honestly thanx febs for remembering haha... ok so as for george this is the pic... on the right... sentosa was fun, liangwei so gundu go into water with phone and wallet. den we really drank alot and had like jap food? haha. and i cant believe that pearlyn really go get black nail polish haha... ok sian its like exactly 1 more week till exam starts and i think i will fail. den have to go for fmr den sian.. siansiansian...haha GIN MARTINI ROX! den at night was like at liquid kitchen den me and kaixiong no nid menu de... regular there liao haha

2006-08-05T02:45:00.000+08:00

today was erm.unexpected!! ok... dint slp the night b4 so woke up like 1 hr late for class den end up skip and went mac eat breakfast... den went home also cant slp so pple please bear with me till monday if im cranky. so the day went by suppose to meet andre at orchard den i late, sorry, den i meet him at bugis. den we went seoul garden to makan. "class gathering", more then half the class was there, so was like so long no see them den talk cock sing song play mahjong lor. den i told george that i had smth on so gotta leave early den he say wanna take foto den ask me wait till 915 and i said ok since there were still pple eating. and the unknown grp of pple at the back of us like 20 of them had us to disturb them. so when i wanted to leave, dre and crys took out a birthday and i thought whose birthday so we sing birthday song, and i stop when i heard my name. OMG LOR so shocking thanx guy love you lots, u all really caught me off guard lor, i so malu still sing first half of hpy bdae. den we ate cake and i was so surprised that i got presents, love you guys even more and to think that u all rmb me bdae so touching lor. so aft that i went to watch dragon tiger gate with kaixiong den we went liquid kitchen to go drink. haha den was like none of us get high?thanx kaisiong go watch movie with me. and sorry for disturbing u through out the show.

and to Crystal, Andre, George, Lifeng, Zoe and Zhang Shuang i really love you the most man, made my dae so special, haha and thanx.

2006-07-30T22:56:00.000+08:00

wad a long week... esp doing the stupid CRS assignment... suppose to be 300-500 words de... but den keh kiang go write 1300+ words.. wth man..haha... fri gonna meet them go makan... and to the girls... please dun drink too much hor... drunk is ok.. getting up feeling like head kena bang by mrt is not..and who is anonymous in tag?? haha go san bloggie see the drunk hamster she drew of me... wth.. haha jkjk.. sian lor... 5 more days before gotta hand up VB and no idea how to start...sian..haha..

2006-07-26T01:40:00.000+08:00

wish list..haha... sian... in the unstarry night what can a lonely guy do? play game!! man... dun u just love metal slug.. haha ok fine its boring... ever seen a transformer smoke?

2006-07-24T23:33:00.000+08:00

yay...blog again... honestly...you've never been to singapore...savvy? haha ok damn into the pirates of the carribean.. and kx i kno... none of us have EVER been to singapore haha... lol... 7th mth gonna start le... damn freaking scared.. dun go stadium le aft wad the old man said.. eee... damn bored... kx are we gonna pon and go see clouds? den bathe change and go get drunk? lets wait till that day comes haha

private sub liquid_kitchen()

if me.wallet=broke
then we go rob
else if me.wallet=full
then we go get drunk

end if
end sub

savvy?

haha
sometimes,somethings needs a resting.

2006-07-21T01:33:00.000+08:00

finally finish db case study...haha finally... sian... now got nth to do... life so miserable right kx? sian sian everyday de... haha... man... feel bad made her angry... ok lor... aft i get well lor...

2006-07-18T02:09:00.000+08:00

by the way the old posts are gone forever and ever...never and ever to be seen...XD

2006-07-18T01:51:00.000+08:00

thoughts, things are flying around inside of me. its like a tape rewinding and playing back again, yet the only image i see is the ceiling.who am i is gonna be the next question. what's next is gonna be asked.such a rush is the world in now.can't we just go a lil' slower and just stop to smell the flowers?feels like the sun is setting just as it is rising.contradicting ain't it?

2006-07-17T01:12:00.000+08:00

cant wait for national day eve. kx rmb go drinking with me.i nid a screwdriver, a brain tumor and a blow job. no its not something explicit, its cocktail. lol or jus settle for a good old fashion pint of beer, wee~. sian i juz wish this semester would juz end. its too boring. but time is going abit too fast. its already another week and soon its gonna be sat again. haha XD.
im still a kid. i wear diapers, sick pacifier and drink from bottle.where diapers is underwear, pacifier is ciggies and wads in the bottle is beer XD.

2006-07-16T10:59:00.001+08:00

dunno wad to do dunno wad to think dunno anything lol... sian i actually wonder how many pple actually see this lor... haha the 1 place that i can put all my thoughts down... lol... ok
1. the smoking ban is rather stupid... take mac for example, put a stand but the smoke still travel over to the other side, the point is, its pointless, for everything else there still marlboro (not mastercard)
2.my brain is burnt till ashes due to fever, soon gonna be vegetable, den i nid scout for vegetarian tofu brain.
3.thought keep flowing in my around, i had enough of love craps anyway, i just wanna lie down on a sandy beach in the late evening, see clouds, sunset, never forgetting having a cup of jack daniel's on the right and a stick on the left. there no point to go looking around for people, when obviously i dont exist and i'm still in my own world.

one day...

??

2006-07-02T20:32:00.000+08:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=72Qw_CS1Ggs

dunno

2006-07-02T11:43:00.000+08:00

sian... dunnow ad to do with myself...everyday also no goal no life... onli look forward to go drinking with my friends... wad is this man... so no life.... play maple story also no life... going crazy liao...haha..lol... sot oredi

poly starts

2006-04-24T22:26:00.000+08:00

poly has started... bored with lectures and tutorials... really wished that i could juz skip all these stuff... met new people, but dun seem to socialise with them... not sure why but in any way hope that one day i will know them.